It gets better by the word

"For the comfort and well-being of all customers aboard United flights, we have aligned with other major airlines' seating policies relating to passengers who:
- are unable to fit into a single seat in the ticketed cabin;
- are unable to properly buckle the seatbelt using a single seatbelt extender; and/or
- are unable to put the seat's armrests down when seated.

If no unused seats are available on the ticketed flight, then the customer must either purchase an upgrade to a cabin with available seats that address the above-listed scenarios, or change his or her ticket to the next available flight and purchase a second seat in addition to the one already purchased. If a customer meeting any of the above-listed criteria cannot be accommodated next to an empty seat and chooses not to upgrade or change flights and purchase a ticket for an additional seat, he or she will not be permitted to board the flight."

Curto e grosso, isto é um resumo da política da United Airlines em relação aos gordos, which in turn can easily be summed up to "you might as well grow thinner, 'cause our seats sure ain't getting any larger". A fixação dos critérios é hílare, quase que imagino uma hospedeira a discutir com um obeso enquanto este tenta desesperadamente demonstrar que, sim senhora, consegue fechar o cinto.